Dear You

Dear Chris,
You promised yourself you wouldn't write letters to yourself anymore. Of course, that lead to the world famous 'Do Post-it Notes count as letters' argument between you and me (you). It was amusing to watch from the outside (I'm told), but since we ended that discussion with a mutal love fest (lonely love fest), we must talk about this.

Letters to yourself are only cool in one circumstance. When it is in fact from another version of you AKA Drunk You. You know who I mean! He used to appear at parties, unsuccessfully flirt with women, successfully flirt with Alex or Paul and than throw up in inapprorpriate but hilarious spots. Now you know who I mean! He kept throwing up in other peoples' toliet. God, wasn't he such a light weight.

Anyway, he can't come out these days. Sober you goes to parties instead and drinks Dr Pepper like a cool kid instead.

Off topic again. In fact, this letter has no topic, other than so you can gloat to your friends that you have successfully beaten your previous record for consecutive blogs written while conscious, and also because you read Jewel Staite's blog and thought writing to yourself looked fun (She did it! it looked fun - me). So let this letter be an important reminder of several things.

A. Copying other people's blogs is a good way to write a blog when you have no idea what to write.

B. You possibly have multiple personalities, but they all love Dr Who so it's awesome.

C. You're coming dangerously close to actually stalking Jewel Staite! Stop that, that's a bad you!

Sincerely
Me (you)

If America can, so can I.

So I was talking with my friend Mike, who lives in America (try not to hold that against him) and he had a brilliant idea. He commented that there is only one way Lucy Liu as Joan Watson would work.

I then thought about it, and decided to keep Sherlock protrayed by an English Actress. It just seems wrong to have anyone other than an Englishman play Sherlock (which is why I'm not as fond of the Robert Downey Jr Sherlock films as I could be.) To me, it'd be like having a non-Brit play the Doctor. But relax, Mike, we found a role for your suggestion.
So now, here I am, in conjunction with Kerri (read her blog here), presenting the gender reversed Sherlock Holmes. After some consideration, we decided that, apart from unusual names like Sherlock and Mycroft, their names will be swapped to represent their new found feminieness or masculinity. Enjoy!

Because I'm not bored enough and Kerri is a tad tipsy, we're sticking with their pre-established backstories, except where it conflicts with their genders. Instead, enjoy these pretty pictures I found on Google of the actresses

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Announcing the cast of the upcoming hit Miss Holmes

Kate Beckinsale as Sherlock Holmes

Lucy Liu as Joan Watson

Meryl Streep as Mycroft Holmes

Neil Flynn as Mr Hudson

Gwyneth Paltrow as DI Lestrade

David Tennant as Ian Alder

And finally, because no show is complete with a villain, presenting:

Emma Watson as Jane Moriarty

Plot: Up in Asgard, following following Thor's adventure as a woman, he and Sif are having an argument about whether women are better then men. Thor is against this notion, whereas naturally Sif is all for girl power. Deciding there is only way to settle the argument, they travel to the stone where Loki is imprisoned. Despite thinking both are idiots for this argument, Loki agrees to turn everyone on Earth into the opposite Gender. Hilarity then ensues.

Chris Hemsworth, Jaimie Alexander and Tom Hiddleston, naturally, reprise their roles from Thor.

That's my plot for Miss Holmes, coming soon to TV screens in your imaginations.

So say we all!

So America's gonna remake Sherlock

Oh, no, I'm sorry. America isn't remaking BBC's Sherlock, starring Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman as Holmes and Watson (pictured below). They're just making a modernised version of Sherlock Holmes' adventures.

Above: Pure Awesome (left) and Pure Brilliance (right).

Named Elementary (really, America? Really?), in this version, Sherlock Holmes is a former consultant of Scotland Yard whose addiction problems landed him in a rehab centre in New York City (because there aren't any in the UK, evidentally). This led him to meeting his sober companion, Watson, a former surgeon who lost her license after killing a patient. Whoops.

That's all well and good for America. It sounds like they've tried to put their own (sterotypical) spin on it, as opposed to plain blatently ripping off the WAY more interesting Sherlock.

Above: Blargh (left) and Pure Awesome (right) during a stage adaption of Frankenstein

Meet Johny Lee Miller (pictured above - the bald one. The other one is Sherlock Holmes), star of Hackers and other things, AKA the new Sherlock Holmes. The good news about this is that he's British. The bad news... well, he's playing an American take on Sherlock Holmes.

Now for the really bad news.

You would NOT believe what I had to type into Google to find a picture of Lucy Liu with clothes on

Meet JOAN Watson. Yes, in this version of Sherlock Holmes, Dr Watson will be a woman. Normally, I'm all for putting a spin on a traditional. When I initially found out that in Ronald D. Moore's Battlestar Galactica, Starbuck would a woman, I was intrigued. Unlike the thousands (read: twelve) people who complained that 'Hey, Starbuck is a cigar smoking, card playing, ace pilot man person', I felt like giving her a chance and I was right to do so. Starbuck in the reimagined series was a brilliant, complex, neurotic character, and possibly even better then the original. 

That is NOT the case here.

Making John Watson a woman can only mean one thing. Sherlock Holmes and Joan Watson will, at some point, be having sex. There will probably be series after series after series (God, I hope it gets cancelled before that point) of 'Will they? Won't they?' moments and frankly, I disapprove. The reason the Holmes and Watson duo works is because they're best friends. Nothing more, nothing less (sorry, Kerri). This is just a marketing scheme to entice viewers and frankly, I do not think it works.

Earlier today, I said to Kerri that I would watch the Pilot and form a judgement based soley on that. I've changed my mind. I will watch the Pilot. However, I will do so hoping that this gets cancelled, and hold onto the notions I have stated here until the show proves to me beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am wrong. Will I be proved wrong? I actually hope so. Do I expect to be? No, not in the slighest.

In conclusion, I think the title is a horrible pun, making Watson a woman is an idiotic mistake and I hope it gets cancelled very quickly.

I don't normally do this

I call eternal dibs on the TARDIS piece. This is done in writing so none can dispute the time and date of this occurring.

So Say I!

The Failed Invasion by the Scottish Wench pt 2

In my last blog (no, I won't give you a damn link - it was the LAST freakin' post), I detailed the first few days of Kerri's visit from Scotland. Obviously, the logical thing to do would be to continue that. Normally, I eschew logic and do whatever I feel like. However, today I will be logical so here is the second installment in Kerri's Magical Adventures in England.

The Rest of Wednesday

John's team won the football, so I guess that was worth losing a laptop for. We watched Fringe. When I say we, I mean myself, Jeremy and John. Kerri instead was on her laptop. Not being a fan of the show (yet), I don't really blame her there. However, getting Jeremy to break his routine is a task worthy of Hercules, we decided not to press the issue.

Kerri and Jeremy remained on their laptops. Being without, I choose to be mature, and irritate the two until we all went to our beds (read: Jeremy and Kerri went to their beds, I went to the couch). 

Thursday

After the day trip to Leeds, we were going to be settling down for a day of very little. We quickly nipped by home to check my mail and get some parcels (DVDs and Kerri's second Christmas Present - A TARDIS key).

Anyway, Jeremy's dad decided to go out, and his mum offered to cook us dinner at her place. Since Kerri had mostly ignored Fringe on Wednesday, we forgoed the usual choice of DVD, and instead took the very brilliant Burke & Hare. However, Sally did not want to watch it, so after a dinner of Lamb steaks (YUM) in a fantastic sauce with chips and veg, we watched Iron Man, followed by the Wii. 

All in all, it was quite a good way to spend an evening!

Today

Today was primarily spent just sitting around, chatting, drinking, snacking and generally being lazy. We watched a DVD, Jeremy and Kerri used their laptops and I alternated between annoying Jeremy and read my Kindle. Then, about three quarters of an hour ago (as of this writing), Dad picked us up and took Kerri to the station.

And that is all of you up to date. Readers of Kerri's blog, I hope you enjoyed the break and change in style. Obviously, I have not covered everything in detail, and no, more details are not available from me, Jeremy or Kerri. Please do not bother to ask.

Loyal Readers of mine may now just leave.

So Say We All!

The Failed Invasion by the Scottish Wench pt. 1

Saturday evening through to Monday Evening

Saturday night, what a night! There was drinking and dancing and a pokemon board game of some kind which lead to more drinking!

Of course, while everyone else was drinking alcohol of assorted sorts, I was drinking delicious Dr Pepper.

As usual, we returned from our drinking adventures in a club with a brief stop at McDonalds for much needed fried goodness. Except it wasn't fried goodness. The Chicken Nuggets left me throwing up for the better part of two days. I would blame the Fries, but I gave them to Alex since I don't like them cold (they're bad enough when they're warm.)

Then it was Monday, which harked the arrival of Kerri from Scotland. Since this is a somewhat rare event, I pretended to be a gentleman and went, with Jeremy whom she is staying with, to meet her at the Station. That evening was spent watching an assortment of DVDs, me carefully eating so as not to risk another evening of vomit, followed by sleep. Also, Kerri got me a Sketch pad and a mini book with a Pentagram on the front. I returned the favour by providing her with the Zombie Apocalypse Survival Guide and another item tba in the next blog (PART 2).

Tuesday

Tuesday was a very lazy day. Instead of me throwing up in the evening, it was Jeremy's bloody Dog...twice. The first time I impressed Jeremy with my strong stomach by clearing it up. The second, I was in time to get him outside. That set the tone for my sleep.

I eventually arose, went through to the sitting room and chatted, laughed and bitched with Kerri between brews, chicken, pork pies and sausage rolls, until Jeremy woke up. From there, we pretty much just watched DVDs and chatted (while one of us stole the other's Demon phone to look stuff up online, irritating Demon Phone's owner).

Some amusement came when I hid Jeremy's DVD of the Hulk in the box for another film, and hid the box behind the cushion on the sofa.

By the end of the evening, Jeremy nearly died on Cracked.com, Kerri was half-reading, half watching a film where Christian Bale adopts a puppy and I was regretting not bringing my laptop. Much fun was had.

Wednesday

Today we went to Leeds with Dad! Most people would be embarrassed to say that, but I actually do love going places with Dad. He's a laugh, and provides entertainment for my guests so I don't actually have to! (Plus he buys me things).

We went to the usual places, with a few add-ons. Jeremy went into Game and was thoroughly unimpressed with it. Of course, being massive Comic Geeks, Kerri and I were enthralled with Forbidden Planet (though left with little beyond a plush cat). We walked up to OK Comics, where Kerri was impressed that the owner knew of Plan B Books, found a couple of books she'd and past me been looking for, and I bought more comics then I really should've.

From there, aside from a brief stop in WHSmiths and HMV, we met my Dad in Waterstones and enjoyed a cup of tea and a mega chat with him before returning to Jeremy's (where the two of us are staying since I have no room at my house). I've read Comics, Kerri's read comics, Jeremy has gold furniture and we've eaten dinner.

Now he's pestering for his laptop, so his Dad can watch a Football game.

Until the next time, loyal readers.

Taking back something I said earlier

Hello, loyal readers.

A while back (specifically back in May '11), I posted about my disappointment about a new figure release. The Time Monster Set, containing the Delgado Master which had previously been released in 'The Claws of Axos' Set. At the time, I lampooned the Set, since Underground Toys had made a massive deal about a big announcement coming. My main problem with the Set was that, after so much of a build-up, it was disappointing considering that the Set contained a re-release.

This is the Set I'm talking about, by the way. Also, picture :D

However, I recently lost my Delgado figure, so it seemed logical to buy a new one. So I bit the bullet, and bought this Set. I have to admit, it is pretty cool. The accessories are fairly awesome, and will probably be putting an appearance in at some point in a bit of stop motion.

So back to the original point of this blog. I retract PART of my earlier statement about this Set. It is worth the money. THAT is the part I am taking back. I stand by my original point that it was given too much hype.

It is also nice to have the option of buying a Master & TARDIS or a Master & Monster set, since both are still readily available.

So say we all.

One year on

In ten days time, it will be exactly one year since Nicholas Courtney lost his short battle with cancer. I decided to make this entry simply to mark the first anniversary of that sad day.

"Now I've hung up my uniform... for good"

Nicholas Courtney

Gone, but not forgotten

The Laser Tag Blog

Today, I am playing Laser Tag in a suit.

Why in a suit, I hear you ask?

Why else? Because I bloody can!

Why I owe my life to a Dog

Unlike my last story, which was about how I amazingly pulled twice on a train and never saw either woman again, this one is about a dog called Jesse. It's important because without that dog, my life would've turned out very differently and possibly even had an abrupt ending.

See, once upon a time, I was very, very young and very, very small (not to mention a little chubby). I was about 3 or 4 at the time, and my Dad and I were walking Jesse, who was a wee puppy at the time.  See, we used to quite near to a place called Chellow Dene, which is an ideal place to walk, run and play. It was just a nice place for pet owners, nature enthutists, fishermen and just people in general to walk.

Anyway, as usual I had run ahead of Dad, chasing Jesse along the path. Bare in mind that the paths form a circle, so he could see me at all times. Anyway, this partcular day, Jesse had disappeared into a wooded area and I was... doing something (I don't remember this myself. This tale has been told to me by Dad). All of a sudden, a man dressed in pajamas from a local mental institution leapt out of the bushes and grabbed me and tried dragging me away.

Dad, seeing this, immediately ran towards me but he was a fair bit behind us, so it took him a while to catch up. Fortunately for me, Jesse appeared out of nowhere and bit his trouser leg. The man, surprised at this, let go out of me as Jesse proceeded to tear his PJ leg off. Dad had caught up and got rid of the man, who claimed that he was only offering me a sweetie, despite the massive line of bruises up and down my arm.

Sufficed to say, we went home immediately.

However, the story is not over yet. Yes, I have explained why I owe Jesse my life but there's more and it gets funny.

Later that day, two policemen came knocking on the door. Dad answered, and Jesse waddled (That's how young she was) over and one of the officers leaned down to give her a fussy. The other officer then asked Dad to to show him the Rottweiler that had attacked a man in Chellow Dene. Dad pointed at Jesse, who had rolled over and was looking extremely cute at this point, and said "That's your dog."

Dad then proceeded to explain what had happened, showing the man my bruises. The Officer noted this down and disappeared. We all thought that was the end of the story.

Sorry, it isn't, but I'm nearly done.

A week or so later, two officers appeared, one of whom was carrying a pound of fillet steak. As the one with the steak gave it to Jesse, the other explained that this man was a pedophille who had previously abducted a young girl. He had managed to escape justice by hiding in the Mental Institution but had foolishly decided to run as soon as he realized that he had lied to the Police. They had managed to catch and arrest him, thanks to Jesse.

Personally, I hope the bastard rots in Hell.

That is why I literally owe my life to Jesse, a beloved dog who sadly passed away at the tender age of 6 due to a form of cancer. Despite her short life, she made an impact on mine and I will always remember her.


To Dad, the memories are his. The errors are mine.

2011: A Retropective of Doctor Who and other stuff

It is 00:56, and I am too awake to go to bed, so I thought I'd give 2011 a review. Yeah, I'm surprised by that too (and by the fact I know how to spell Retropective!)

Life stuff

2011 featured a lot of ups and downs for me. Fortunately, it was comprised of mostly Ups. I saw some friends in Scotland again, which is always a good thing. Two of my best friends got married, which is definitely a good thing! I was an Usher for them, and recieved a very nice wallet as a thank you. There were also the usual Birthday Parties and night outs to enjoy, which are always good.

One set back came when the woman I currently like became involved with someone else, but what can you do? I didn't make a move in time. It's no one's fault but my own in that respect. As the old saying goes, there are plenty more fish in the Sea.

My health related issues got a little worse for reasons I won't go into here. The people who need to know details already know details and for everyone else can simply sod off!

I also find it a little worrying that most of what I can think is related to sci fi stuff, and not my own life.

Likes and what not

As always, my love for Science Fiction was sated with Doctor Who, Fringe, Haven and, towards the end of the year, Terra Nova.

The figures produced this year were a bit hit and miss. There were plenty of Classic Who Releases, including Enemy of the Nth Doctor Sets, a concept I hope continues for a while, and The Chase Set! Gotta love some classic Daleks! On the flip side, the Nu Who Line left me disappointed. While there were some truly brilliant figures, most of the line was made up entirely of re-releases, both tweaked and untweaked. As I mentioned in a previous post, the new CB line seems to be getting a bit more attention.

2011 was something of a bittersweet year for Doctor Who Fans. Two beloved actors, Nicholas Courtney and Elisabeth Sladen, sadly passed away. In the latter's case, this meant the end of the popular spin-off Sarah Jane Adventures. Fortunately, the last episode served as a fitting finale, and Sarah Jane Smith was most definitely at her best throughout!

Gone, but definitely not forgotten

Doctor Who was, as usual, brilliant. Some episodes could've been better, especially Night Terrors. I think Mark Gatiss spent too much time building up the atmosphere (he did that well) and found he had to rush the conclusion. Another slightly lackluster episode was "The God Complex", though I think this was more to do with how much this episode was built up by trailers and what not. Fortunately, these two were the only bad episodes of the second half of the Series. The rest were brilliant, especially those with River Song. The Wedding of River Song was stunning, both visual and in terms of storytelling. Moffat will have to pull out every stop to top it (which I have every faith he will).

As I mentioned above, the passing of Elisabeth Sladen spelt the end for the Sarah Jane Adventures. However, due to her illness, Mrs Miller (her married name) had requested that they film part of Series 5 with Series 4, which meant that there were a few more episodes to show. "Sky", the premiere episode, opened the series with a bang. Named for the "new Luke" character, it served as a suitable introduction for the soon to be Sky Smith. The Curse of Clyde Langer followed it, and featured Cylde falling under the influence of an Alien entity and becomes instantly hated by any who hear or read his name.

The finale, The Man Who Never Was, served as an exceptional end to the Series. Due to it not being intended as such, it has a feel of "All Good Things...", the final episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation to it. I have to say, I love endings like that. For those not in the know, "All Good Things..." ends with Captain Picard joining the Poker Game and the Enterprise flying off into Space, ready to explore strange new worlds and seek out new life. I always like the idea of endings which imply that, while this part of the story has ended, the main one hasn't. Obviously, with Elisabeth Sladen's death, several mysteries that were intended to be explored in later episodes and series, such as the identity of the Shopkeeper and Captain, will never be explained, but I can live with that.

Torchwood: Miracle Day left something to be desired as well. After two brilliant episodes, the plot just seemed to slow down. The characters you wanted to live died in the end, the characters you wanted to die lived and (in one case) (SPOILERS) became immortal (SPOILERS). The explaination for what caused the Miracle was medicore at best, and downright lazy at worst. The only good thing about the series was seeing how the Rhys/Gwen dynamic had evolved, and the end of the damn Jack/Gwen/Rhys Triangle, with Gwen FINALLY choosing Rhys over Jack.

Other stuff of note

There really isn't anything else I can think of to add, beyond 2011 was just as good or bad as the year before it (except for May - May 2011 was DEFINITELY better than May 2010). As an overall final grade, I give 2011 a 7/10. Lots of good bits, but some bad ones as well.

There you go.

It is now 01:28am and I am done. Please return to your regular lives.




Seriously, it's done. Leave please.





No more Retropectiving.





This is just sad. Go away.




GO AWAY, DAMNITT!